


Wait For You

by bilgegungoren00



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Phantom Zone, Post 2x21, lead poisoning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-17
Updated: 2017-05-18
Packaged: 2018-11-01 21:42:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10930608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bilgegungoren00/pseuds/bilgegungoren00
Summary: “He’s not gone, Alex,” she whispered, wishing she sounded more confident. “He’s not gone.”Or in which Mon-El gets lead poisoning, and Kara has to face the possibility of losing him forever.





	1. Come Back For Me

**Author's Note:**

> Hey y'all!
> 
> Okay, I think everyone has been thinking that in the finale there's the possibility that Mon-El could get lead poisoning and will have to be sent to Phantom Zone, which I hope doesn't happen of course, but if it does it'll be solved quickly next season, because I don't want to think of Supergirl without him lol. BUT with all the informations about the season finale, the possibility is still there, soooooo I wanted to do my take on it. This is gonna be a two-part one-shot, and I don't know when the second part will post but I'm currently working on it so it shouldn't take longer than a week.
> 
> Anyway, I have to say two things before you read the story:  
> (1) It's gonna be pretty angsty, so I'd advise you to prepare yourself.  
> (2) I truly, TRULY hope, knowing my plans for part 2, that this doesn't end up happening in the show. I'd probably die in tears if it did. 
> 
> Sooooo, with that said, I hope you like this!

Kara felt her fingers bite into her palm as she paced in the DEO, her arms crossed over her chest and her lips pressed together. She’d gone back and forth so many times that she was pretty sure she’d created a path under her feet. She knew walking would not help the situation one bit, yet she couldn’t help herself. With worry churning in her stomach and fear paralyzing her thoughts, staying still would equal to drowning in them, and this was one time she needed so desperately to keep a clear head. She couldn’t let herself succumb to fear when…when her boyfriend needed her. When he was lying a couple of feet away from her in the med bay, a lead bullet lodged in his chest, barely hanging onto life.

Kara stopped pacing for a second and lifted her head to look at him. Tubes and wires were protruding from his head and chest, checking his vitals—was it just Kara or was his heart beating a little bit too weakly—and there was a hoard of doctors and nurses swarming around him. Even that little glimpse at his unconscious body was enough to leave Kara breathless. It didn’t take a genius to understand he was _not_ well. With lead poison spreading around his body…

 _I never knew lead could affect him this badly._ Sure, Jeremiah had said, when they were in Cadmus all those months ago, that they needed to stop lead poison from spreading in his body, but she never thought… She never thought it meant lead was _fatal_ to Mon-El. She thought it was the same with her vulnerability to kryptonite; it weakened his powers but it was only that. Yet she’d been wrong. She’d been _so wrong,_ and because of that Mon-El was fighting for his life now.

She should’ve been there for him. She should’ve been by his side, she should’ve seen the bullet going for him, she should’ve jumped in front of it and stopped it. Yet she was so _busy,_ so _focused on_ defeating Rhea that she’d left him in the streets, alone, to _protect_ the civilians. And he did that perfectly, didn’t he? That was what Alex told her. He’d gotten shot because he jumped in front of a stray bullet to save a young girl. And according to her sister… He knew what the bullet would do to him. He knew he was vulnerable to it, and he still _knowingly_ got between the bullet and the girl.

Kara wondered briefly if he also knew the bullet could do more than just wound him, and poison him to _death_.

 _No,_ she thought, the moment that word seeped into her mind. _No,_ Mon-El was _not_ going to die. He wasn’t going to leave her, not like…not like this. Not when they finally got rid of everything trying to separate them. They defeated Mxy. They got rid of Rhea and sent her off to Phantom Zone. They’d struggled through kidnappings, and lies, and misunderstandings, but each time they’d found their way back to each other, and…and now they had the chance to be together without worrying about anything. They _should_ have that chance. She couldn’t lose him now, she couldn’t lose him _ever._

Biting down her lip she turned around to look at him again, willing him to wake up, to open his eyes, to _fight_ through the poisoning and come back to her. She willed it with everything that she had inside, as if…as if wanting it enough would bring Mon-El back. As if it would keep him from dying.

Kara was distracted from her thoughts when she saw the door of the med bay open. She snapped her head to see who was it, and the moment her eyes met with the two women disappointment washed over her. She didn’t know why she even thought it could be Mon-El; there was a good chance he wouldn’t be able to stand even if he was awake. Yet her shoulder still slumped for a brief second before she rushed to Alex and Eliza’s side before they could even close the door.

“How is he?” she asked, trying to keep her voice steady. It still started quivering by the end of the sentence. “Is he gonna be…?” Her voice trailed off when she saw the look on Alex’s face. She shook her head fervently, feeling her heart sink in her chest. _“No.”_

“Kara,” Alex started, trying to reach for the Kryptonian’s hand. Kara pushed it away as she stepped back, another silent _no_ escaping her lips. She continued shaking her head, as if denying it would somehow make the whole situation…not real. It couldn’t be real. Mon-El would be— _had to be_ —okay; he would come back, he would wake up, and he’d laugh at all of them for worrying about him. _I’m not going anywhere,_ he’d say. _You’re gonna have to put up with me for a bit longer._ And then… And then Kara would laugh at him, with tears of happiness in her eyes; she’d hug him and pull him close, listening to his heart beating healthy and strong…

He had to be alive.

“He’s not gone, Alex,” she whispered, wishing she sounded more confident. “He’s not gone.”

“He’s not,” Alex said, reaching for her sister and holding her arms. Her sympathetic gaze was fixed on Kara’s eyes. “But… But the bullet was too close to his heart, Kara. Even though we took it out it was too late. The poisoning had already reached his heart.” Kara felt her heart slamming against her ribs as she tried to process Alex’s words. She couldn’t even feel relief to hear that he wasn’t dead, because she knew what came afterwards. He wasn’t dead… _yet._ The poison was in his heart, which meant it would be spreading throughout his body at an incredible rate. It would kill him, it would kill him _fast_ and there was _nothing_ she could do about it. She was _Supergirl_ and yet…yet she couldn’t save the ones that she cared about the most. She couldn’t… She couldn’t punch her way through this, she couldn’t use her powers to fix this situation; this wasn’t a physical enemy that she could fight. This was _death,_ and there was _no way_ to fight death. There was no stopping it, no delaying it, and once it came there was no going back. It was final, it was just so… _final._

“No, please,” Kara whispered, looking inside the med bay, her eyes finding Mon-El’s face. If she ignored the cables and tubes attached to his body she could almost pretend he was sleeping. He looked… He looked _way too peaceful_ to be dying. “Alex, I can’t—“ She had to stop when air got hitched in her throat. _I can’t lose him,_ she thought desperately, clinging onto it. She _couldn’t_ lose him, so she _wouldn’t_ , right? If something was _impossible_ it wouldn’t happen. That was what it meant.

“Kara…” Eliza started, sadness and understanding flickering in her eyes, as she tried to reach forward. “I know you’re hurting now—“

“You don’t know how I’m feeling!” Kara snapped, not being able to help herself. She stepped forward, desperately staring at Alex’s eyes. “Alex, you have to save him. Please, you have to—“ She had to stop when tears overwhelmed him, blurring her vision. She had to clench her fists to keep herself from punching something, or holding Alex’s arm way too harshly for a human. She shook her head again.

“I’m so sorry, Kara,” Alex whispered, her eyes shining with unshed tears, as she reached forward and wrapped her arms around the Kryptonian’s shoulders. Kara couldn’t hug her back, she couldn’t even _feel_ her hug. She kept her eyes on Mon-El, silently begging him to not go, to not leave her, to _fight_ for their relationship just like they did all those times before. He just had to try _hard enough_ , and he’d be okay. He just had to _love_ her enough, just as much as… Just as much as _she_ loved _him_.

_And you have never told him that._

Her vision blurred when her own tears welled up in her eyes. She blinked them away to keep her eyes on Mon-El, not wanting to turn her eyes away in case…in case he _died_ when she did that. Watching him, seeing his chest rise and fall, hearing the slow but steady beeping coming from the monitor… It was a proof that he was still alive, that he was still here, and she was afraid the moment she looked away all of that would stop. _He_ would…

 _Please, Mon-El,_ she thought, pleaded, wishing one of the abilities yellow sun gave her was telepathy. _Please, please hold on. Hold on for me._

And with that, the moment those words crossed Kara’s mind, the beeping from the heart monitor spiked as if on cue. As if Mon-El was waiting for her to ask him to…to keep fighting. To hold on. _For her_.

“Mon-El,” she whispered, scrambling out of her sister’s embrace and rushing inside the med bay. After the spike the beeping continued in an unsteady pace, way faster than it had been previously. She didn’t even waste time looking at that as she stood next to the cot, grabbing Mon-El’s hand in hers, gripping it so tightly that she was sure his bones would be crushed to dust if he was human. She fixed her gaze on his face, her heart slamming against her ribs. His eyelids were flickering. _His eyelids were flickering._

“Mon-El?” she croaked as she reached up, cupping his cheek softly. Her thumb swept over his cheekbone, wiping away a drop of sweat. She kept her eyes on his, waiting, waiting for him to open them, waiting for him to look at her with his deep, grey-blue eyes, needing to see them, needing to know that—that he was still here. That he was—

“Kara…” Alex said from behind her quietly, almost too quietly, as if she was afraid to get closer. Kara didn’t even bother with her as she stroked Mon-El’s cheeks.

“Hey, I’m here,” she whispered, leaning forward. “Mon-El, I’m here. You can open your eyes. You can _fight_.” _Please fight. Please._ She could feel her hands shaking as silence engulfed the room, the only sound coming from the heart monitor. The beating was still unsteady, and Mon-El’s eyelids were still flickering, until…

Until he blinked, and thanks to her super speed she managed to get a glimpse of his eyes. Her heart skipped a beat.

“He’s blinking!” she announced, dropping her hand to his shoulder. Mon-El blinked again, as if he heard his voice, and a couple of seconds—about twenty of Kara’s heartbeats later—he finally managed to keep his eyes open. Tears rushed into Kara’s eyes as she let out the breath that she didn’t even realize she was holding. A small smile pulled her lips. “Hey.” The word came out in a raw and cracked voice.

It took Mon-El some time to focus on her, but then the corner of his lips tipped up in a tired smile. “Hey,” he answered, and she felt him trying to squeeze back her hand. It didn’t really work. “I think I have a new power again.” A laugh burst out of Kara’s chest without her intention as she remembered what he said all those months ago, when he was infected with the Medusa virus. _Did you learn a new power where you can duplicate yourself? Because I'm seeing two of you and it's really cool_.

“Yeah,” Kara whispered, tightening her grip on his shoulder. “You have a tendency of doing that.” Mon-El tried to laugh at that, his eyes trained on her face, but it only came out as a weak cough. Kara’s heart plummeted in her chest when she saw a drop of blood on his lips.

“Maybe…” he started, his voice rusty. “Maybe we should stop doing that.” Kara could only nod as an answer when she felt a knot lodging in her throat. Alex’s words echoed in her mind. _It was too late. The poisoning had already reached his heart_. And one look at Mon-El confirmed her words. He looked so pale and gray that he could easily play a zombie part in The Walking Dead, his breathing was shallow and fast, and his heart sounded so weak and unsteady that it didn’t seem like…it didn’t seem like he had much time left. He was holding onto life by threads, and they were tearing one by one, and at the end…

“Hey, sweetie.” Kara felt Eliza step next to her, touching Mon-El’s forehead gently. “How are you feeling?” She had a soft smile on her face that the doctors had when they were about to give bad news. Or else Kara was interpreting that way. She didn’t know which one it was, and she didn’t really care. She stroked her boyfriend’s neck softly with shaky fingers, trying to keep her tears at bay.

 _He’s awake now,_ she reminded herself. _He just has to hold onto that. He can do it. He is strong. He can do it. He can._

“Dr. Danvers,” Mon-El mumbled, his voice low. He looked almost peaceful when he looked at Eliza. An… An accepting look. _No_. “It isn’t your fault. You—“ He had to stop when a cough cut his words.

“Hey, Mon-El,” Kara moved his hand to the nape of his neck immediately, supporting his head so that the blood that now stained half of his lips didn’t get caught in his throat. “You’re gonna be okay. We’ll… We’ll figure out a way. You just need to hold on.” Her voice started quivering by the end when Mon-El’s eyes met with hers. And she wasn’t wrong, there _was_ acceptance in them. As if he was accepting his fate. As if he thought nothing could be done about it. _No._

He forced a smile at Kara as he turned over Kara’s hand, letting the back of it rest on his stomach. “It’s okay,” he whispered, making sure he was looking at Kara’s eyes the whole time. Kara could see he was struggling to hold on, he was almost _hurting_ , yet he still kept going. “I saved… I saved that girl.” He almost looked proud at that. A tear spilled from Kara’s eyes and slid down her cheeks. She didn’t even bother to wipe it away; she didn’t want to let Mon-El go even for one second. She nodded.

“You did. Mon-El, you did, and…” She had to bite back her sobs. “And I’m proud of you. But now we have to save you. You have to let us save you,” she pleaded, not caring how broken she sounded. Mon-El still had a smile on his face as he shook his head.

“The poison reached my heart, Kara. I heard.” His voice was barely a whisper, like he didn’t have the strength to talk louder. “I don’t… I don’t have much time left.” She shook her head fervently.

“That’s not true,” she objected, as if saying those words would make it right. “We have… We have years in front of us, Mon-El. We have a future, _together_.” Mon-El’s thumb stroked the back of her hand as he pressed his lips together.

“I need you to…to know something,” he croaked, almost ignoring her words. She shook her head again.

“Don’t say that. Don’t—“

“Thank you.” Mon-El searched her eyes as he continued. “For—For making me who I wanted to be. For making me happy.”

“Mon-El, _please_ ,” Kara begged between her teeth, desperately trying to stop him. He couldn’t say those things, not now. It sounded… It sounded too much like a goodbye, and she wasn’t sure if she was ready for that. She couldn’t say goodbye. “You can say them later, okay? We _will_ have a later.” Tears were continuously streaming down her cheeks by then. Mon-El smiled at her as he tried to reach up, but his hand fell too weak. Closing his eyes, he gulped. Kara’s heart sank in her chest when she saw his eyes close shut, but he opened them again not even a second later.

“Your eyes look so…beautiful when you cry,” he said, trying to laugh. “Like…comets.” Kara didn’t even have the strength in her to force a smile. She felt tears overwhelming her, and she had to blink several times to get rid of them and see Mon-El clearly. She didn’t want to miss one second of his life. “You’re always so…so beautiful, and special, and… And I love—“

“No,” Kara tried to interject, but Mon-El didn’t stop.

“You,” he finished his words, a fulfilled smile playing on his lips. “Kara Zor-El, I love you.”

“No, Mon-El,” she whispered, her voice cracking mid-sentence as desperation fell over her. “Please don’t… Don’t leave me. Please stay with me. I can’t—“

“You can,” Mon-El disagreed when her voiced trailed off. A silent sob escaped her mouth when she felt his fingers circle her wrist, squeezing it. “You are so strong, Kara. You can do anything.”

“But I don’t want to!” Kara yelled desperately, a silent sob escaping her mouth. She gripped the nape of Mon-El’s neck tightly, as if somehow if she held him just strongly enough she’d be able to keep him here. “I don’t want to live without you. _Please_ , Mon-El. I…” The words almost got stuck in her throat, but she pushed them out. She needed him to know. She needed him to know so that he could fight, so that he had something to fight for. And she needed him to fight, to stay with her, to not leave her so, so desperately. “I love you too.” Mon-El almost seemed surprised as he searched her eyes. She choked out a hopeless laugh. “So you have to stay with me, do you understand? I can’t lose you. I can’t lose someone else that I love.” She pushed his hair away from his forehead and stroked his cheek gently. “And I love you.”

Mon-El blinked when she finished her words, almost breathless, and then slowly a grin spread on her face. She could feel the tension in his shoulders easing and the strength leaving him slowly. “Good,” he whispered with a slow nod as he blinked, as if trying to hold on, and then…

And then his eyes closed.

Kara waited for him to open them again. To blink, to come back, to smile at her, and yet…yet they didn’t. She didn’t know how much she waited for him to wake up, yet by the end she was gripping his shoulder desperately. She could hear the monitor beeping steadily and slowly—but beeping nonetheless, showing he was still alive—and she could hear his heartbeat, yet still she couldn’t focus on them. She cupped his cheeks. “Mon-El?” she whispered, running his fingers through his hair. There was no response. Her stomach clenched as she shook her head, a sick feeling filling her mouth. “Mon-El, don’t close your eyes, please!” She didn’t know how she was still standing when her knees weakened, yet she somehow managed to hold on, shaking Mon-El’s shoulders. Or else she was the one that was shaking. “Don’t leave me. Open your eyes. Come on. You can do it. _Please,_ you have to do it. Just…just hold on. Hold on.”

She felt two hands on her arm, trying to pull her back. “Kara, it’s too late,” Alex whispered in her ear, her eyes gentle. “I’m sorry, it’s too late.”

“No!” Kara objected, pushing her sister’s hands away. “No, it’s not.” She took Mon-El’s face in her hands again, searching it desperately to find a sign that…that he was still awake, that he was alive, that he was with her. There was none. “We have to bring him back. Alex, we have to save him!”

“There’s nothing we can do,” Alex said, putting her hand gently on Kara’s shoulder after a second of hesitation. Kara didn’t bother turning to her. “I wish there was a cure, Kara, but there’s no way we can find it before the poisoning spreads and kills him.”

“Then we have to slow the spreading!” she cried, sobs rocking her body. “We have to… We have to find a way to slow it down until we find a cure. We have to…to stop it, somehow, until—“ She stopped when an idea hit her in the head, stopping her sobs almost immediately. She barely felt Alex squeeze her shoulder.

“I wish there was a way—“ she was saying, at least before Kara interjected.

“Phantom Zone,” she whispered, never taking her eyes off of Mon-El. She could still feel Alex’s confusion.

“Kara, I don’t understand—“

“Time… Time doesn’t pass there. It stops bodily functions. Breathing, digestion, circulation…” For the first time since she entered the room she looked up at Alex, a newfound hope blooming in her chest. “We can send him there, Alex, using the—the Phantom Zone projector in the Fortress. It’ll give us time to find a cure. And then… And then we can bring him back and save him.” Alex blinked at her with her mouth dropped open, at least before she clamped it shut. There was a crease on her forehead.

“Kara, that’s—“

“Don’t tell me it’s impossible!” she yelled, gripping Mon-El’s shoulders. “We have his pod here. We can put him in there and send him.” The determination in her voice faltered when she looked back at the Daxamite in her arms, fighting for his life. She pushed back her tears desperately. “We have to at least try. Please, Alex. I can’t… I can’t lose him.” She traced the lines on his cheek with her fingers gently, wiping away a couple of drops of sweat, before she turned back to Alex. She had to swallow hard to get rid of the knot in her throat. _“Please.”_

Either it was the desperation in her voice, or the helplessness in her eyes, but finally Alex agreed to Kara’s request with a nod. “Okay, we’ll try. I’ll ask Winn if that’s possible,” she promised, holding Kara’s arms briefly for support. There was honesty in her eyes. “We’ll do everything we can to save him. I promise, okay?” The only thing Kara could do was nod. Alex looked at her with a painful smile before she hugged Kara briefly, and then left the med bay, presumably to find Winn. Kara turned his eyes to Mon-El then, running her fingers through his hair. She forced a smile tearfully.

“We’re gonna save you,” she promised, pushing back his hair. “I’m not letting you leave me, okay? I won’t ever let you leave me.” Leaning forward she pressed her lips on his forehead, savoring the feel before pulling back and memorizing the lines of his face. She never wanted to forget him, and she knew there was a chance that…that she might not see him for years, if not…if not forever.

She quickly pushed those thoughts away. No, they would see each other again. He would come back, and they would be together, no matter… No matter how far in the future it might be. They would, because she knew that they…

They loved each other way too much to spend a forever without each other.


	2. Every Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all! 
> 
> I kinda wanna pat myself in the back right now, because I was planning to finish this this Friday at the earliest, but now we're here, on Thursday, and I'm posting this long ass chapter. I feel kinda proud lol :)
> 
> Anyway, I hope you like this!

_**2 years later** _

Kara set the video camera across the table from her, making sure it was recording and it could see the whole set-up. Straightening up her floral dress and braid she plastered a smile on her face and pulled a chair, sitting right in front of the camera.

“Hey, Mon-El!” she sang out, ducking her chin to look straight at the device and waved. “So, guess what date it is?” She pointed at the chocolate-caramel cupcake in front of her, adorned with three candles. “It’s your third Earth birthday!” Clapping her hands, she made sure her grin didn’t falter as she reached for the matches, even though a huge knot was lodged in her throat. “So, you know, I wanted to do something a little special for you today.”

_I would’ve done something special for you if you were here._

She lit the candles one by one while she continued talking, trying to shut out the painful thoughts. “And instead of buying you something like I did the last two times, I wanted to prepare something for you.” She put aside the matches, watching the flames of candles flicker for a while, before turning to the camera. “Well, I did buy you something,” she continued explaining, “but I also prepared something that I think…” She cleared her throat to get rid of the shakiness in her voice. “That I think you’ll like.” She had to shut her eyes for a brief second to keep her emotions from overwhelming her, and hoped all that practicing she did in front of the mirror, trying to fake a smile, worked. Mon-El didn’t need to know how horrible she was feeling, especially because he’d definitely find a way to blame himself for that. He had the tendency to do that.

Of course, considering he’d be back to do all of those.

Kara shook her head immediately at that. _He’ll be back,_ she thought to herself. It didn’t matter if it’d been years since…since they had to send him Phantom Zone, and it didn’t matter they weren’t closer to finding a cure to his lead poisoning than they’d been the day they sent him, she _would_ get him back. Someday, somehow she would, and when that happened…

She didn’t want him to have missed all of those years of her life. Wasn’t that why she’d been recording the videos ever since she managed to pull herself out of the depression of losing him? He’d probably feel horrible that he didn’t get to be with her for a long time, and she wanted it to feel like he had never left, at least for him. And… And _she_ also didn’t want to spend all those moments without him. The videos were… They were a way for her to have him by her side, even though he was light years away from her now.

“So, here’s your first gift,” she said once she managed to slip away from her thoughts and turned back to the camera. She cleared her throat as she stood up and grabbed it, carrying it to the basket next to her TV. “It’s right here,” she showed the huge box wrapped in a red package, “next to all your other gifts that you’ll get to see once you’re back.” She smiled at the camera. “It is a pretty big pile now, but I hope you’ll like them all.” And it _was_ a big pile, growing a little bit almost each month. She didn’t even want to count the amount of gifts that were there, because it was only an indication of how long it’d been since he left. Yet she was sure there were at least twenty or twenty five of them.

“But anyway, that’s for another day,” she added to keep the mood up and returned to the table, putting the camera back in its place. “This day is all about your birthday, so… Happy birthday.” She forced a smile that she hoped looked real before blowing out the candles for him, not being able to stop himself from making a wish. _Come back to me, Mon-El. Please. I don’t want to live another day without you._ She stared at the smoke that came out of the candle in tangles, and she willed with all her heart that her wish would come true this time. She’d been wishing the same thing on both his and her birthdays, and after five birthdays…

She shook her thoughts away and smiled at the camera. “As for your second gift… Wait for me here.” She jumped to her feet and rushed to the corner of the living room to grab the guitar. Her heart was stuttering when she returned to her seat. “I know you’re probably surprised,” she told the camera, placing the guitar on her lap and resting her arm over it, “and thinking ‘when the hell has Kara learned how to play the guitar?’, but I’ve been preparing this for 7 months now, so I’ve had some time.” She took the guitar pick from her pocket and checked if the guitar was tuned before continuing. “And as it turns out, it’s really easy to learn how to play an instrument when you have super speed, and a lot of free time since…” Her voice trailed off as she struggled to get out the following words. _Since you’re not here now._ She swallowed hard to get rid of the knot in her throat and pressed her left fingers on the strings lightly. “So here’s hoping this goes well and I don’t mess it up.” Taking a deep breath she played the first chord to try herself before starting the song.

_One step closer_   
_Closer to the light_   
_No matter where we're going_   
_I'll be by your side_   
_And everything we used to know_   
_Crashed into the great unknown_   
_One step closer_   
_We're gonna be alright_

The words she’d spent weeks to memorize flowed out of her mouth easily, coming together with the melody from the guitar. It’d taken her a lot of time and consideration to choose the song she wanted to sing for Mon-El. At first she wanted it to be happy and joyful, just like how they’d been when he was on Earth, but the more she looked at those cheesy I’m-so-in-love-with-you kind of songs the more lonely she started feeling, because in every single one of them the two lovers were together. It’d just reminded her that Mon-El wasn’t by her side, and that she had no idea when she’d be getting him back.

Then she’d started looking at songs about longing and missing someone, yet everything she could find was either too painful or had a sad ending. That put her in a depressed mood yet again for a whole another reason. She didn’t want her story with Mon-El to have a sad ending. She didn’t want their story to be over, she didn’t want to think that she might never see him again.

Instead she opted to choose a hopeful song. Something that wasn’t too happy but that promised happiness. That promised a happy ending. Something that said, “I know we’re not together right now, and I know things doesn’t look too great, but one day we’ll find our way back to each other and we’ll be happy together.” That was why she’d chosen _Find My Way Back_ by Eric Arjes when Winn suggested her to listen to it, because it was exactly what she was looking for. It expressed the feelings she didn’t know how to put into words, and it promised that Mon-El and her would be together again. One day they’d be find their way to each other.

_On my way now_   
_Don't give up on me_   
_And no one knows what_   
_What tomorrow brings_   
_These weary eyes will never rest_   
_Until they look in yours again_   
_I'm on my way now_   
_I still believe_

Tears welled up in her eyes even though she desperately tried to blink them away. By the time she sang out the last line her voice had started quivering, and it’d become infinitely hard to hold everything together. She’d been trying to hold everything together for so long now, especially when she was shooting the videos for Mon-El, that it was… It was hard. Harder than she ever thought it would. Initially she shot a video almost every day, filming short snippets of her life, but for the last year it’d gotten less and less frequent as the videos got longer and longer. She just couldn’t handle doing it every single day and remembering he wasn’t here with her. In the last couple of months it’d dropped to once in two weeks if there wasn’t anything special. And she hated it. She hated that she couldn’t do this one thing for her boyfriend because it just _hurt too much,_ when Mon-El was struggling to live up there in the Phantom Zone. She was sure if the roles were reversed he’d not only never give up on her, but he wouldn’t let anything get him down. He’d probably film hours of videos every day just for her…once hhe figured out how to use a video camera. That was one thing Kara hadn’t taught him yet.

Kara blinked her tears away as she forced a smile, playing a few chords before continuing with the song. The words came out harder than she thought, and she even felt a couple of tears wetting her cheeks by the time she was halfway through the chorus.

_Cause even underneath the waves_   
_I'll be holding on to you_   
_And even if you slip away_   
_I'll be there to fall into the dark_   
_To chase your heart_   
_No distance could ever tear us apart_   
_There's nothing that I wouldn't do_   
_I'll find my way back to you_

The last words came out hoarse as tears overwhelmed her. Ducking her chin she unsuccessfully tried to blink them away, yet all she managed to do was get her lashes wet. Her vision was still blurry as she played the last few notes on the guitar. She felt her shoulder slump as the guitar rested limply on her lap.

“I-I’m sorry about that,” she tried to apologize, desperately wiping her tears away and forcing out a laugh. “I didn’t plan to get emotional. The song was supposed to be…be hopeful.” Squaring her shoulders she put the instrument away and pushed away the strands of her hair that escaped her messy bun. “But I hope that you liked it. I mean, I hope that you’ll…you’ll like it if you— I mean, _when_ you come back.” She felt her smile dissipate from her face as the strength left her shoulders, and once again her body slumped forward. Gulping, she clasped her hands together on the table, turning her gaze away from the camera to hold herself together.

“I just…” she started as she looked up. “I miss you, Mon-El.” _I miss you so much that it hurts._ She felt tears building up in her throat again as she stood up and grabbed the camera to stop the recording. A part of her wanted to fling it to the wall but she stopped herself. There were still a couple of videos in it that she hadn’t uploaded on her laptop yet. Well, Mon-El’s laptop that she bought for him so that…so that she could give it to him when he came back, with all those videos in it. Instead she clenched her teeth, wiped her tears away furiously, and put the camera back into her drawer. She then returned to the table, ready to bury herself in the sugary goodness that was chocolate and caramel cupcake, yet she ended up standing and staring at it for full five minutes. _It was Mon-El’s favorite flavor,_ she couldn’t help thinking. She tried to bake it for his first birthday—even though he wouldn’t be there to eat it—yet it ended up being a complete disaster, and she’d just given up when she had to throw away the third batch. It took her about a couple of hours to completely clean up the kitchen.

Tears blurred her vision again as she clenched her teeth and grabbed the cupcake, throwing it to the wall with a scream. It hit with a thump, leaving a blotch of golden and brown frosting there. She couldn’t even care about it as she covered her mouth, trying to repress her sobs, and fell down on the chair behind her. Her body was shaking with silent sobs when she closed her eyes and tried to pull herself together. It got harder and harder to do each day, with each…each special date that Mon-El missed. Not too long ago, on Valentine’s Day she’d had a huge breakdown, especially as she put the flowers she bought in a vase and placed it next to Mon-El’s gift basket. “I don’t even know why I’m trying,” she’d muttered more to herself than to the camera in her hand and shook her head. “They’ll all probably be wilted by the time you come back.” That was what had happened to all the other flowers she’d bought, and thinking about throwing away all of them before Mon-El even got to see them… She couldn’t keep it together. Going on without him…

She never knew it would be this hard. She’d tried to prepare herself for spending maybe _years_ without him, and on paper it might not have sounded that terrible, but actually going through it… She could never prepare herself for anything like this.

A knock on the door distracted her from her thoughts. Quickly wiping her tears away she stood up, even though they were replaced with fresh ones almost immediately. She didn’t even need to use her X-ray vision to know it was Alex. The Kryptonian almost felt relieved that her sister was here now and she didn’t leave her alone on…on a day like this. She never left her alone when it came to that. Even though she didn’t have it in her to even smile at Alex when she opened the door.

“Hey,” she said dryly, stepping back and letting Alex in. She expected her to have a painful but understanding smile on her face and two cartoons of ice cream in her hands, yet that was not what Kara saw. Her sister seemed almost… _excited_ as she strolled in, hope shining in her eyes.

“Kara, you’re not gonna believe what happened,” she said, almost breathless. She couldn’t stop herself from grinning as she turned around, facing Kara. The Kryptonian closed the door with a sigh and plastered a smile on her face, at least trying to be excited for her sister. She wondered what could’ve happened to make her this happy. Maybe she’d just forgotten that it was the day Mon-El landed on earth because of that.

“I’m listening,” she said, her voice sounding strained because of her tears. She hoped her sister wouldn’t be able to hear it. Alex stepped forward with that, grabbing Kara’s arm. Her brown eyes never left Kara’s blue ones.

“We found a way to cure Mon-El’s lead poisoning.”

* * *

Kara rushed into the Fortress of Solitude, Alex right behind her, her heart slamming against her ribs. The moment those words left her sister’s mouth, the moment she said there was a way to cure Mon-El, she didn’t lose time. She changed into her Supergirl costume in record time before she grabbed Alex and flew them to the Fortress. Her hands were shaking as she took the scene in front of her in. The portal that they used to send Mon-El to Phantom Zone was working, and in front of it…

“Winn!” she exclaimed, running to her friend’s side. Winn turned to her, along with J’onn, who was standing next to him. Both of their eyes were shining with happiness and…and hope. They were shining with hope. Kara felt a bit of her worry fade away looking at them. She was worried that…that when Alex told her about saving Mon-El it might’ve been a lie. A joke. A mistake. But the looks on Winn and J’onn’s faces confirmed it: It was true. _It was true._

“You found a way?” she asked, her voice low and quivering, almost pleading for Winn to confirm it. He nodded excitedly as he pointed at the serum in J’onn’s hand.

“Yeah! Well, it was mostly Eliza, but yeah.” He pressed a couple of buttons on the tablet he was holding and showed it to Kara. “We’ve run every simulation we could run with it, and Kara, it _works_. The serum… It speeds up the rate at which his body creates the enzymes to break up lead without overheating and killing him. That was always our struggle but…but we finally figured it out.” He looked up at Kara, holding her arm. “Kara, we’re getting him back.” Kara felt tears welling up in her eyes as the reality hit her, and she couldn’t help it as she wrapped her arms around Winn. She tried to hold back her super strength as to not hurt him, but it was…it was impossible with the emotional turmoil going on inside him. Hope, excitement, joy, happiness… All those things that she rarely felt in the last couple of years rushed in her as tears spilled down her cheeks.

“Whoa!” Winn laughed as he hugged her back with one arm. “Kara, I know you’re excited, but I kind of can’t breathe now.” Kara found herself laughing as well as she pulled back, wiping away her tears quickly.

“I’m—I’m sorry. I’m just…”

“You missed him,” J’onn finished her sentence, stepping next to the Kryptonian. He put an arm on her shoulder. “We know, Kara. We all did.” Kara nodded, feeling the longing with even more force in her stomach now that…now that she was so close to getting him back. She turned to the portal.

“Now let’s get him back.” Winn told everyone to step away from the portal.

“Okay, I’m directing the pod to the portal. It should come any minute now, and when it does, you need to be _fast_ J’onn. We don’t know how much time he has before the lead poisoning spreads again.”

“I know, Agent Schott,” the Martian told him, stepping forward. “I heard it the first ten times you and Eliza told me.” His hands weren’t shaking as he held up the serum, which made Kara feel a bit more relieved. She was sure she would never be able to hold it steadily with the way her fingers were trembling.

“Well, I’m just checking,” Winn muttered as he focused back on his tablet. “Also, don’t keep the needle in him for long. It’s also laced with lead.” Kara’s heart almost stopped with that as she snapped her eyes to the IT specialist.

“What? You want to _expose_ him to the thing that put him in there in the first place?” Winn turned to her, understanding filling his eyes.

“Don’t worry. It won’t hurt him. But we needed a way to give him the cure intravenously, and the only thing that penetrates his skin here is lead.” Kara’s heart skipped a beat as she shook her head.

“It also _poisons_ him, Winn,” she hissed between her teeth, desperation lacing her voice. “What if the serum doesn’t work and he gets poisoned all over again? What if this time we can’t—“ She couldn’t continue as her voice trailed off and tried to shut out her fear. She felt Alex’s light touch on her arm.

“It’ll work, Kara,” she promised, squeezing the Kryptonian’s arm. “Trust me. We weren’t doing this if we weren’t sure.” She nodded reassuringly, rubbing Kara’s shoulder. The Kryptonian felt her strength dissipating for a second. Her shoulders slumped as she desperately tried to blink her tears away.

“I’ve waited too long, Alex. I can’t lose him now.” Even the thought was enough to leave her breathless. All those years… All those years when she felt desperate, or lonely, or afraid, she’d held onto the idea that she’d see Mon-El again. That he’d be alive, and they’d get… They’d get the future that they planned. If she lost him now, she’d also lose that tether of hope that tied her to life. It would wreck her, and she didn’t know… She didn’t know if she’d be able to get through it. She did not want to find out.

“You won’t,” Alex promised, linking her arm to Kara’s and pulling her close. “Okay? You won’t. We tested every possible scenario. Mon-El is gonna be okay.” After a second of hesitation, after searching Alex’s face for a sign of lie Kara nodded, feeling the lump grow in her throat. She turned to Winn.

“Do it.” Winn smiled at her before looking at J’onn and signaling him to get ready, and then everyone in the room held their breath as they looked at the portal. At first nothing happened. The more seconds passed, the more anxious Kara get, especially since they passed a bit slower to her than others. She didn’t know whether just a couple of seconds or a minute had passed when she saw a ripple in the portal, but the moment that happened her heart rate spiked.

“It’s coming through!” Winn announced, just before the pod appeared. Kara couldn’t contain herself as she let Alex go and rushed to it before it made its way completely out. She could feel her heart pounding, each heartbeat ringing in her ears, as she grabbed the handles of the door. Without bothering to try and open it regular way she ripped it off, revealing Mon-El in his DEO attire. Just like… Just like how he’d been three years ago, when they sent him off. He was still sleeping, he was still pale, yet he was there, and he…

Kara heard his heart beating slowly among the other rushing heartbeats in the room, and relief washed over her shoulders. He was alive. He was alive. Their plan had worked and…and Phantom Zone kept him in stasis. He wasn’t gone.

“J’onn, bring the…” Before she could finish her words J’onn appeared in front of her, tore off Mon-El’s sleeve and injected the serum in his arm. It didn’t take more than a couple of seconds to do it. All that time Kara kept her eyes on her boyfriend’s face, tears welling up in her eyes when she saw him again, in flesh, instead of in all those photos and videos she had saved in her phone. He was here, he was alive, and he’d…he’d wake up. She’d be able to talk to him again. She’d be able to hear his voice in real life, she’d be able to hug him tightly, she’d be able to rest her head on his chest and listen to his heart, beating healthily and strongly, just like she used to do it all those times before they had to send him away. They’d be together, _again_ , after years of being apart, and with that thought happiness washed over her, making her feel week for a second. A small smile pulled her lips as she blinked her tears away, so that she could see Mon-El clearly.

“Get him to DEO.” J’onn’s voice took Kara out of her thoughts. She looked up at the Martian. “Hook him up with monitors to check his vitals. We need to make sure the serum is working.” Kara gulped as she nodded curtly, keeping an ear on Mon-El’s heartbeat as she scooped him up from the pod. She let his head rest on her shoulder.

“You’re gonna be okay,” she whispered to him as she flew away from the Fortress, making her way to the DEO building. “You’re gonna be okay.” _And we’re gonna be together._

She held onto that thought as tightly as she could, afraid of what might happen if it all fell apart.

* * *

Kara never knew the beeping coming from a heart monitor could make her feel this relieved. Usually it was a noise that she didn’t enjoy. It was loud, it was distracting, and when she was in the DEO and somebody was hooked to the heart monitor in the med bay, she felt like she could hear it from every single room. Yet now she relished it, savored it, and thanked Rao that it kept beeping every single minute, indicating that Mon-El was alive. Her eyes flickered to the pattern on the heart monitor briefly as her lips pulled into a smile before she looked at Mon-El.

It’d been hours since he came to earth, hours since they hooked him up to the monitor, and he was still alive. He was here, and he was… He was stronger than before. His heart wasn’t weak. He wasn’t so pale and grey. Life returned to his cheeks slowly as they regained their color, and his heart grew stronger with each passing minute thanks to the cure and the yellow sun lamps. He was okay. _He was okay._

Even the thought was enough to bring tears of happiness to Kara’s eyes.

Lacing her fingers through his she brought his hand to her lips, pressing a small kiss on his knuckles. She had no idea how _good_ it would feel to get him back. She’d imagined it, of course. She’d even dreamed about it. Yet for it to happen in real life… If was a comfort, a relief like nothing else. She didn’t have to dream about it, or wish for it to happen anymore. She had him.

Now all he had to do was to wake up.

Kara’s eyes flickered to the clock on the wall, seeing that the time was past 1 a.m. It probably wasn’t healthy to stay here since she had to go to work the next day, but she didn’t even care. She could always call in sick. But being here when Mon-El woke up… That was something she’d never get to do again. And she needed to be here then. She needed to see those…those grey eyes she loved so much, filled with light and hope and _life_. She needed to look at them, she needed to make sure that he was alive. Not only that, she needed to see him smile, she needed him to hold her hand and squeeze it, she needed him to cup her cheeks, lean forward and press her lips on hers, kissing her like he’d never kissed her before. She needed it so badly, she _missed_ it so badly that it hurt.

Straightening up she pulled her chair closer to Mon-El—as if that was possible—and reached forward to push a strand of his hair away from his forehead. It hadn’t gotten a bit longer, which wasn’t surprising, but it was still…weird to see him exactly like he’d been when she lost him. It felt like no time had passed, and the moments she spent without him was just a horrible nightmare, except…except the scars on her heart would never fade as a reminder of that time. Yet she didn’t mind to think it was a nightmare. As long as they were together now, what happened in the past didn’t really matter. As long as they would be together in the future, past could stay in the…past.

Holding onto that thought Kara felt the corners of her lips tipped up, and she stroked Mon-El’s cheek lightly with the tips of her fingers. “You’re so beautiful, you know?” she whispered, her eyes traveling on his face. “I’ve spent more than two years without you, and I’ve met a lot of people during that time, but you’re still the most beautiful man I’ve met.”

As if Mon-El was waiting for her to speak, the moment she finished her words his heart rate spiked. Kara’s hand froze over his cheek as she looked up at the monitor, hearing the beepings get faster with each passing second. Her heart started pounding as well as she leaned forward, looking at his face. “Mon-El?” she said with a thin voice, her eyes searching his face. His eyelids were flickering. Her heart stopped with the shock of seeing a sign of life before it started beating three times faster than before. She dropped her hand from his face to the nape of his neck, holding him tightly. “Hey, baby, I’m here. I’m here. Can you hear my voice?” The monitor beeped at an unsteady rate for a couple of seconds, as if answering her. Tears filled Kara’s eyes as she couldn’t help laughing. “I’m taking that as a yes,” she muttered as she squeezed his hand tightly. “Listen to my voice, Mon-El. It’s me, Kara. And… And you’re here with me. You’re alive. You can… You can open your eyes. You can _wake up_.” Mon-El’s eyelids continued twitching for a couple of seconds after that until he started to blink, and _finally_ Kara’s eyes met with his grey ones. Relief washed over Kara as she felt her knees weaken, but she managed to hold on as tears welled up in her eyes again. She blinked them away fervently, trying to get rid of the blurriness in her vision and see Mon-El clearly. She wanted—needed—to see his eyes, the eyes that she missed so much, the eyes that she searched for in every crowd and felt disappointed when she couldn’t find it. The eyes that used to look at her with so much love and adoration that she felt like the strongest and most beautiful woman in the world. That she could do _anything_ she wanted to do. She needed him to look at her the same way again, she needed to feel their strength and support, their…their _love_.

“Hey,” she gasped when their gazes met, running her fingers through Mon-El’s hair. He looked confused as he blinked again, as if he was dizzy. A tear escaped Kara’s eyes and fell down her cheek. “You’re alive.” Her voice cracked mid-sentence, yet she couldn’t care as she stared into her boyfriend’s eyes, savoring the light, the…the _life_ in them. After thinking he’d never be able to open his eyes again when he closed them all those years ago, seeing them was like feeling the sun on your face after staying in a windowless room for years.

“Kara?” Mon-El mumbled, trying to straighten up. Kara let him get comfortable on the cot by adjusting his pillow, yet her eyes didn’t leave his face even for a second, just like his didn’t leave her face. “Am I… Am I dead?” Kara shuddered at that thought and shook her head.

“No, you’re not, thank Rao.” She chuckled, seeing amusement fill Mon-El’s eyes. “You’re back now. You’re gonna be okay.” A smile pulled the Daxamite’s lips as he looked at his girlfriend, and Kara felt him wrap his fingers around her hand and squeeze it, _really_ squeeze it. It wasn’t weak like it’d been when he was poisoned. It was a strong, reassuring grip. She couldn’t stop her tears from streaming down her face. Mon-El reached up with his other hand and wiped a tear away.

“Are you sure I’m gonna be okay?” he asked, his voice rusty. “’Cause you really don’t seem like it.” His thumb swiped over her cheekbone so softly, so lovingly that Kara couldn’t help laughing. She dropped her hand on his chest and nodded.

“Yes, yes, I’m sure,” she said, balling his shirt in his hand. “I’m sure now.” And wasn’t that a good feeling, to get rid of all the doubts about whether she’d be able to see him again or not. “Everything’s gonna be okay now that…now that you’re here.” Mon-El’s lips mirrored the smile that was plastered on her face. At least before he frowned.

“I thought I was dying,” he said, turning her body to Kara’s side of the bed. “No, I was pretty sure of that, because I remember Eliza mentioning lead poisoning. And then… And then I was saying goodbye to you—“

“It wasn’t a goodbye,” Kara interjected, cupping his cheek to stop the memories from filling her mind. She couldn’t take her hands off of him, worried that…that if she did it he’d slip right through her fingers again. She couldn’t let him go again.

“Kara,” Mon-El said quietly, giving her a disbelieving look. Kara’s shoulders slumped with defeat as she was forced to accept it. She flickered her eyes away for a second before looking back, not wanting to lose the sight of him. “It was a goodbye. I was gonna die.” He searched her eyes. “How did I survive?” He looked so serious for a second, so puzzled and…and almost afraid that it might not be real, that Kara’s heart cracked for him. She squeezed his shoulder briefly to show him that he was alive.

“Phantom Zone.” Mon-El lifted his brows. “I mean, we sent you to Phantom Zone so that…so that your bodily functions would stop so that the poison wouldn’t spread more. To win us some time to find a cure.” She tried not to think of all that time that she had to spend without him. “And we did. So now you’re here. You’re back.” Her voice was shaking because of her tears as she stroked Mon-El’s cheek, reminding himself over and over again that he was truly here, that this was real and he wasn’t dreaming.

A smile spread on Mon-El’s lips as he looked at Kara, his love written all over his face. “Yeah,” he whispered. “I’m here.”

* * *

“Two years?” Mon-El whispered, looking at the date on the phone Kara gave him. His voice was hoarse as he rested his elbows on his knees, not being able to take his eyes off of the screen. “It’s been _two years?”_

Kara felt her throat knotting as she scooted closer to him on the couch, wrapping her arms around one of his. “It’s okay, Mon-El,” she whispered, rubbing his knee. “It wasn’t your fault.” She watched him as he shut his eyes briefly and opened them again, as if hoping the date would change from 2019 to 2017, and they wouldn’t have lost any time. His shoulders slumped all over again when it didn’t, and Kara really didn’t think that would be possible.

“I was away for two years,” he repeated, finally turning her eyes to Kara. “Kara, that’s…”

“Hey,” the Kryptonian interjected, lifting her hand to cup his cheek. “You couldn’t have done anything about it. We chose to send you to Phantom Zone so that…so that you could survive. So that those two years are the only thing we lose instead of a forever.” That thought still scared the hell out of her. She didn’t even want to think of a forever without Mon-El.

“But Kara, it’s…it’s a long time.” He desperately tried to blink away his tears. “I just thought, when I saw you with were me when I woke up that…that not much time had passed. Maybe two or three months at most. But two years… You should’ve moved on.” Kara had opened her mouth to disagree halfway through Mon-El’s words, but the last part caught her so off guard that the words died on her tongue. She frowned.

“Mon-El, what are you talking about?” she asked, searching his face. He took a deep breath as he scratched his cheek and put his phone aside. He wasn’t even looking at her.

“You shouldn’t have waited me for so long. You should’ve lived your life, Kara. Gone out and…and found someone else. I’m not—“

“Okay, wait a second there,” Kara cut in this time, lifting her hand and shaking her head. “First of all, if you were planning to end that sentence with ‘I’m not worth it,’ I’m seriously gonna consider punching some sense into you.” Mon-El could only chuckle dryly at that. “And second of all, _of course_ I was gonna wait for you, Mon-El. You would’ve waited for me for _years_ if the roles were reversed. Don’t tell me you wouldn’t.” Mon-El opened his mouth, probably to disagree, before he stopped.

“Of course I would,” he whispered, his eyes filled with honesty as she took Kara’s hand in his. “But Kara, that’s…that’s different. You’re… You’re amazing. You deserve to be waited for. And you deserve a life where you don’t have to wait for anyone.” Kara felt her heart break at the pain in his voice as she shook her head. She reached forward to take his face in her hands.

“Mon-El, you didn’t choose to leave, I wasn’t waiting for someone that abandoned me. You almost _died_. And even besides that, you’re amazing too. You’re worthy of waiting, okay? You _are_.” She searched his eyes to make sure he believed in his words. “Don’t forget that.” Mon-El looked at her for a couple of seconds without saying anything, disbelief coloring his eyes, before he nodded. Kara could see that he still didn’t believe her 100%, but at least he wasn’t objecting either. He pressed his lips together.

“But… But even without that…” He turned his eyes away to look at his hands. “I missed two years of your life. I just... It feels like no time has passed for me, but for you…” His voice trailed off as he struggled with his words. “And that’s a time we can never get back, no matter how much I want it.” A small smile pulled Kara’s lips with his words as her eyes fell on the computer on her coffee table.

“Actually,” she started, reaching for it and pulling it on her lap. “That’s not exactly true.” Clearing her throat she opened the lid of the laptop, feeling Mon-El’s puzzled gaze on her. “See, when you were in the Phantom Zone, I didn’t know how long you’d be there. And I knew there was a chance you could be there for a long time, so I decided to, um… I decided to prepare something for you.” She looked up at Mon-El, her gaze genuine. “I didn’t want you to miss any part of my life either.” He lifted his brows as he took the laptop from her, looking at the folder she opened. And he came to a complete stop. His fingers were frozen over the keyboard. Kara fidgeted uncomfortably, waiting for his reaction.

“So, what do you think?” He stayed silent for a couple of seconds before looking up at her, his eyes filled with a storm of emotions.

“Kara,” he whispered with a raw voice. “What are… What are these?”

“Videos,” Kara started explaining, shifting closer to him on the couch. She put her hand on his arm. “Of me. My life, I mean. I took them for you, so that when you came back you could watch them, and it would be like…like you were here too.” Reaching up, she rubbed his shoulder, flashing him a smile. “So you wouldn’t have missed any part of my life.” Mon-El seemed speechless as he blinked, listening to her almost hazily, before he returned to the computer. He clicked on one of the videos with shaky fingers, and her face popped up with the night sky behind her. She immediately remembered what day it was even before looking at the date.

“That’s from 4th of July,” she explained before Mon-El started the video. “The Independence Day of United States. I know technically that it’s not our home country, but…but it’s a fun day with lots of celebration and fireworks, and I thought you might like it.” The Daxamite barely nodded as he started the video, his gaze fixed on the screen. Kara could hear his heart pounding in his chest.

“Happy 4th of July!” Kara exclaimed on the computer, her eyes looking directly at them. At…Mon-El. The wind was blowing her hair to her face yet she didn’t seem like she minded as she shook her hair away. “So, I can hear you asking right now, ‘What is 4th of July?’ It’s basically a day that American’s celebrate their independence.” She pointed at the American flag painted on her cheek. “I would’ve liked to explain a bit of its history, but I really can’t remember one thing about it right now, so you’re just gonna have to make do with that.” She smiled, pushing a strand of her hair away from her face. “Anyway, besides the history of it, I think it’s a really fun day that people get together, party, throw fireworks and confetti, and basically have the time of their lives, and I thought that you’d have really liked it if you were here, so I wanted to show it to you.” She turned the camera to the sky, CatCo building in sight. “This rooftop is the best place to watch the fireworks in the city. And sometimes being able to fly has its perks.” A corner of Mon-El’s lips tipped up at that, and Kara found herself smiling too. She watched him as he watched her on the computer. “It should start anytime now.” The moment her words ended the first streak came into the view, and it exploded in red sparks. Kara saw Mon-El’s face widen as he watched that. After the first one several others followed, each of them in the colors of America, each of them more beautiful than the last. They came together so beautifully, so perfectly that Kara felt herself being transported back to that day, but this time… This time Mon-El was by his side. This time they were together. She squeezed his hand to remind herself of that.

“I’ve never seen firecorks,” Mon-El muttered under his breath, almost entranced by them. Kara chuckled to herself as she corrected him.

“It’s fireworks. With a ‘W’.” Her heart fluttered with that. She didn’t know how that was possible, but she missed even correcting him when he misspelled something. And from the way Mon-El smiled, she could see he liked it too. He nodded.

“Yeah, that’s what I said.” Chuckling Kara shook her head, feeling a bubble of happiness fill her heart. She watched as the fireworks stop on the computer screen, and the view turned to her once again. There was a huge grin on her face, and her eyes were shining with happiness, as she looked at the camera.

“Pretty cool, isn’t it?” she said, straightening up her shoulders. “One day, when you come back, I’m gonna show them to you in real life. But for now this’ll have to do I guess.” Sighing she pushed her hair back, flashing a smile at the camera. “I love you, Mon-El,” she finished her words and blew a kiss before the video ended.

Kara actually felt Mon-El go still under her hands. He couldn’t do anything as he stared at the screen, even though it went black, so much so that it got the Kryptonian worried. She leaned forward to look at his face, frowning. “Mon-El?” she whispered, lacing her fingers through his. “Are you okay?” Mon-El slowly turned to her, his eyes wide. As if he couldn’t believe what just happened.

“You love me?” His voice sounded so small, so thin that she felt something break in her chest. He really didn’t seem like he believed it, even though… Even though she told him that before he passed out because of the lead poisoning. She reached up and ran her fingers through his hair lightly.

“Of course I do. I told you I loved you, Mon-El.” She made sure she sounded as sure as ever. He blinked several times, obviously remembering the memory, before he shook his head.

“I thought you…” he started, and then stopped for a second to pull himself together. “You said it because I was dying. To make me feel better.” Kara’s mouth dropped open with his words as she couldn’t help wincing. She didn’t know whether she should feel angry that he could ever think she was lying, or sad that he didn’t think she could love him. She decided a mixture of that.

“Mon-El, I fell in love with you way before you got lead poisoning,” she started explaining. I just… I was just so scared to say it. I’m sorry that I made you think that, but it’s not true.” Taking his face in her hands, she made sure he was looking at her as she said the next words. “I love you, Mon-El of Daxam. Don’t you ever doubt that.” Mon-El stared at her for a couple of seconds, as if trying to decide if she was telling the truth or not, before a smile spread on his face. It was so wide, so genuine, that Kara couldn’t help smiling either. Mon-El cupped her cheek as he leaned forward and rested his forehead against hers.

“I love you too, Kara Zor-El of Krypton.” With that he pressed his lips on hers. Kara’s eyes immediately shut close as she felt herself getting lost in the kiss, savoring the feel of it. After not being able to kiss him for more than two years… It felt so good, almost too good. She couldn’t get enough of it. She couldn’t get enough of him.

The kiss ended too quickly when he pulled back, his eyes never leaving Kara’s. There was a permanent smile plastered on his face as he turned back to the computer. “I wanna watch more of these videos,” he announced, his fingers traveling down Kara’s arm and holding her hand. “I want to watch all of them.” Laughing Kara shook her head.

“It might take some time. I think there’s at least three hundred of them there.”

“I don’t care,” Mon-El answered immediately, squeezing her hand. “I already lost too long of your life. I don’t want to miss another second.” Kara could literally feel the butterflies flying around in her stomach as she looked up at him.

“Good, because I’m not letting that happen.” She reached up and planted a small kiss on his cheek. “But there’re also a bunch of gifts that you need to open.” She pointed at the basket next to the TV. Mon-El’s brows climbed on his forehead.

“Gifts?” He squinted, trying to count them. “How many of them are there?” The only thing Kara could do at that was shrug, her thumb drawing circles on the back of Mon-El’s hand.

“I have no idea. There’s…a lot.” She turned to her boyfriend. “But we have time for all of that now. We can do all of that.” Mon-El’s eyes shone with happiness at that as he nodded, maybe a bit too enthusiastically. Yet she didn’t even care. They were together now, and they were happy. He had the right to be enthusiastic and joyous.

“Yeah,” he agreed with a nod to her words. “We have all the time in the world.”


End file.
